JSB’s Jottings

On cats and recipes

I have been informed that two items of newsletter content seem to get the most interest from readers, namely, cat pictures and recipes. Seeking always to bring pleasure and satisfaction to you, my loyal subscribers, I now take the bull by the horns (note: I have not seen any evidence that pictures of bulls bring much return, but I did not invent the phrase, and who would take a bull by the horns anyway, except perhaps Ernest Hemingway? But I digress) and make my humble contributions.

Cats

I have no cats and therefore no personal cat pictures. You can search for cat pictures on the internet and find as many as you like, including those funny cat videos people toss up (though it’s getting harder and harder to tell what’s real and what’s AI, just as it is with all of life these days). Here is a cat picture:

Julie Newmar as Catwoman

My good friends, Mr. and Mrs. W_____ (the name comes from the Scandinavian word for “blank line”) have two cats, neither of whom warm to my attempts to make friends. One cat immediately disappears the moment I walk through the door. The other cat lounges around, and when I seek to give it a little pet behind the ears, she gives me a paw swipe and a look that says, “This is my space and my time, and if I want anything from you I’ll let you know, but don’t hold your breath.”

“In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.” – Terry Pratchett

JSB’s Thrilling Caesar Salad

When I was a struggling actor I paid my rent by waiting on tables. I worked for a while at an upscale place called Josephina’s. One item on the menu was a table-side Caesar salad. You don’t get that many places anymore, sad to say. I got really good at it. I’d work from a tray, mixing all in a wooden bowl (it must always be a wooden bowl!) This included the coddled egg, the most entertaining part of the presentation.

PREP:

One day before the meal, prep a head of romaine by separating the leaves in a colander, and giving them a spray wash. Shake the water off the leaves and lay them on paper towels. Roll or wrap up the leaves in the paper towels and put them all into a large plastic bag and seal it up. Put them in the refrigerator. They can last crisply for up to a week.

Ingredients:

5 garlic cloves, minced

2 anchovy fillets, minced

2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon or lime juice (no seeds!)

1 teaspoon dry mustard

2 dashes Worcestershire sauce

1 mild dash Tapatio or Tabasco sauce

1 coddled egg

1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan

1/2 cup croutons

6 tablespoons olive oil

Romaine lettuce

In a wooden bowl put the garlic, anchovies, mustard, Worcestershire, lemon juice, Tapatio, egg, and whisk them all together with a whisk or a fork. Gently drizzle about 6 tablespoons of olive oil as you whisk some more.

Add the lettuce and put on the Parmesan cheese. Toss. Add the croutons and toss.

To coddle an egg, I microwave a bowl of water on high for 2 minutes, place the egg in the bowl for 2 minutes, remove the egg and run some cold water over it. Then comes the art form, cracking the egg, keeping the yolk in one of the half shells, then pouring it into the other half shell so most of the white runs off. Pour it in the other one more time, then put the yolk in a ramekin.

This makes a salad for two as a meal all its own. Or enough to serve as a side at a dinner party. As you prepare it at the table, you may dazzle your guests by telling them that this famous salad was not named for Julius Caesar, but for an Italian-American restaurateur named Cesare Cardini. He opened a restaurant in Tijuana, Mexico during the Prohibition era of the 1920s. Americans flocked to Tijuana, where they could drink, gamble, and eat. During one busy Fourth of July weekend, Caesar was running low on food. So he gathered whatever ingredients he could find in the kitchen, then prepared his salad with theatrical flair at a table.

As you finish the mixing, you can end with this: “Speaking of Julius Caesar, he once went into a bar and ordered a martinus. The bartender said, You mean a martini? And Caesar said, If I wanted a double I would have asked for it. Let’s eat!”